Connected Final (Needs cutting down)

This is my final short film. I am very pleased with it but I still need to trim it down to approximately eight minutes long rather than it being over nine minutes long.

Connected - Rough Cut 4

I have started to add music to this version of my short film but I still believe that more music will have to be put into the final version. I have also included titles and credits.

Improvements

-The music needs to start as soon as the titles start.
-The music should stop when the protagonists go out the door and go jogging. This is to ensure that the audience can get a clear comparison of the two from the diegetic sound.
-I need to add more music throughout and vary the music to ensure that the audience is kept interested. Such as romantic music when the happy person is having a meal with Rachel.
-I also need to ensure that I add a phone noise when the phone goes off.
-I need to add 'Editor' to my titles.

Connected - Movie Review

Connected - Rough Cut 3

Improvements/Teacher Feedback

-I need to include a fade out as soon as the unhappy person goes upstairs after jogging. I need to do this to add to the pace of the film in order to ensure that the audience does not get bored.

-I also need to have the door bell sound when the happy person is laying the glasses on the table. I need to do this to add to the continuity and it should add to the flow of the film.

-I need to cut down the dinner scene because it is far to long and because both sides are not doing much in the scenes the audience will most likely get bored.

-The most important scene that I need to change is the point of view shot when the happy person comes back from the cinema to find the unhappy person on the sofa. I need to extend the point of view shot in order to have one long shot of the happy person entering the room, picking up the bowl, turning off the television and turning off the light. This should ensure that the audience is interested in the film and should help with the continuity of the film.

-In my next cut I also need to add titles and credits and I need to edit the sound by including music and editing out any unwanted sound.